Feeling Powerless- Key Steps to Surrender

Who’s in Control Here?

Powerlessness is a state of recognition that no matter how much we intervene in the recovery of our partner, we have no control over the outcome. Their behaviors, motivation and sobriety are out of our hands.

Surrender of our idea of control and acceptance of our powerlessness is a difficult endeavor and often counter-intuitive to self comfort when in relationship with someone struggling with sexual integrity.

Tips for Surrender:

1. Make your desires known to your spouse and step aside.

Share your heart with your spouse and allow God to do his work.  God’s timing may not be comfortable but will always be powerful and impactful than our efforts.  The apostle Paul shares with us in Acts 1:7-8 that it is not for us to know God’s timing, but to receive power through the Holy Spirit. Also remember that true healing is in heart change and that is done by God’s hand in his time.

2. Slow down consumption of knowledge on sexual addiction.

Sir Francis Bacon coined the phrase “knowledge is power” and we often believe this to be truth.  But in 2 Corinthians 12:9

Paul rejects this with truth that God’s power is made perfect in our weakness.  Awareness is great but be mindful to avoid overload in effort to feel empowered.

3. Raise your white flag.

Stop focusing on your partner’s recovery and begin your own journey of healing.  Turn your focus upward and inward to find peace, hope, and genuine faith in this trial.

~Original Article can be seen on PorntoPurity.com

~Author: Stacy Farris, MS, LPCA, NCC with permission to post at Miller Counseling Services, PC